The pitter patter of the raindrops outside my widow has been constant for some time now. With sleepy eyes, I look out of the window pane that is splattered with little droplets of water. The nearby tree and its yellow flowers make a beautiful impression on the beads of water and it looks like a bright floral wallpaper. Seems like no later than 6 in the morning…..and I start to wonder, this place looks familiar.
Am I dreaming? Yes I guess so, still how can it be so in my skin?
I try to jolt myself out of the realms of sleep, instead find myself walking towards to veranda wrapped in my quilt.
I put my hand out in the open to feel the drizzle on my palms….cold thin needles of rain pierce the arms and sends a shiver through the body…..Ah! so refreshing! The gentle breeze flows through the hair and I gather my quilt a little more closer….
I sit down on the broad banister with my chin on my knees…..the drizzle keeps touching occasionally…… the silence cannot be measured, both within and without……the trees sway their branches to the tune of the breeze and make a melodious rustling sound…. My eyes gaze upon the vast expanse before me….. the swings, the see-saw, the grass, the crooked tree right on between the field, all part of my life here at the sleepy corner of the world…. It was difficult to figure out these same things last night in the mist covered white blanket of nature. Today they all look so fresh and alive again!
A nagging voice at the back of the mind, emerges its head again…..No, no, everything is fine, stop thinking about it now…..look how beautiful everything around is….. but what about all that has been happening over the couple of months……???
Sweat breaks out as I try to fend it off…..why am I not able to break off this prism…. Wake up! Wake up! I turn on the bed…the ordeal carries on…tears start flowing and I can feel its warmth on my pillow…
The bell rings, and the pupils start scrambling out to freshen up…its Sunday, everyone looking forward to meeting their folks…. “Are you not going to get ready?”, a familiar voice echoes from behind…. I turn around and find the friendly nurse standing there with a sweet smile. I nod my head in disagreement. “Okay, but make sure to have breakfast and your medicines”. Once again a silent nod is all that comes out.
I look down from the banister and see the girls playing in the field before me….should I join them? Will they play with me? Why do I not have someone to care for me too? Why am I asking so many questions?
After about an hour of gazing at the happy souls below me, I retire to the sanctuary of my bed, where the wet pillow and the warmth of my quilt awaits this solitary child of lonesome wild…
The rains have started again…the phone has been ringing for sometime now…I peep out of the window, its been pouring… I get out of the house on the balcony and let the soothing water drench me and wash me of the past memoirs…